Playful Parenting

What if playing with your children could decrease arguments, increase cooperation and help your child grow into a strong, independent, empathetic adult? Sound too good to be true? In Playful Parenting, the author gives specific examples of guided play that can help you to form a strong bond with your child and teach interpersonal skills in a fun playful manner. My favorite advice involves weapons and war play. With two boys  I see a lot of this kind of play and I struggle with the appropriate reaction. I don't want my children to hurt others, or to think of guns as toys, but I understand the need to play fighting and aggression. Lawrence Cohen suggests that rather than forbid this type of play, parents should join in. By joining the war, we can turn the play from me against you, to cooperative action. If your child pretends to shoot you, you can pretend it was a love ray and smother them with kisses. Or, you can pretend to be injured and ask them to be your doctor.
If he or she insists on fighting, be on his team and create a strategy. Ambush the enemy, capture the stuffed animal army, whatever it takes to be included in the game. By doing this, it becomes a shared experience, instead of solitary violent play. Children lean so much more this way than they do in time out! I wish all parents were willing to meet their children on their level (the floor), rather than ignoring or punishing undesirable behaviors. The world would be a more peaceful place!
http://www.playfulparenting.com/